Nothing Can Hold Me
by Synnerxx
Summary: John and Elliot get shot in court. Fin worries.


**Pairings: Fin/John**

**Notes: Slight AU tag to 7x06 Raw.**

* * *

"Where is he?" Fin demands as soon as he enters the waiting room, the doors swinging closed behind him.

"Still in surgery." Olivia says, face pale and drawn.

"Any news?" Fin asks, worry knitting his brows together.

"No. You know as much as I do. Elliot's in Recovery if you want to see him." Olivia shakes her head, fingers clenching slightly around the white cup in her hands.

Fin nods and heads to talk to Elliot. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I got shot." Elliot says, a smirk on his face.

Fin chuckles, though it's a bit forced.

"Any news on John?" Elliot asks, watching Fin with concern.

"He's still in surgery." Fin says as Olivia comes back in.

"He'll make it. He's a stubborn bastard." Elliot says, trying to smile a bit and wincing in pain.

"I'm gonna get a coffee." Fin says, needing space to breath.

The Fed stops him outside Elliot's room. "Detective Tutuola, I am sorry about the things I said to you. I find it reprehensible, but I had to keep my cover."

He shakes her hand. "We're good."

"Any news on your partner?" She asks, squeezing his hand before letting it go.

"He's still in surgery." He says with a sigh.

"Let me know if there's anything I can do for the two fo you." She says, resting her hand on his arm briefly before turning and walking down the hallway.

Finally Fin is left on his own to get his coffee and sink into one of those uncomfortable plastic chairs. He sips at the coffee, even worse than the kind they have, and heaves a sigh. He's anxious and worried and he feels powerless and helpless and he hates that feeling because he's useless in this situation. He can't save John's life and it's killing him right now.

Olivia and the captain come in and sit with him, coffee in their hands too. They try to talk about the case, about other cases, about the weather of all things, but eventually they fall silent around Fin and Fin's grateful for that.

It's been two hours since Fin got to the hospital and finally the surgeon steps into the room and looks around at them.

Fin stands up. "How is he?"

"Bullet nicked an artery, missed his heart. He should make a full recovery with no complications." He says, nodding at them.

"Can we see him?" Olivia asks, coming to stand next to Fin.

"He's unconscious right now, sedated, but you can see him, yes." He says with a small smile.

Fin hurries down the hallway, making a conscious effort not to run. Olivia and Cragen hang back, letting him go in first.

John is still out, looking paler than usual, and so unlike himself without his sarcastic smirk on his mouth and his glasses perched on his nose. He's so still, laying there in the bed, the lights dim, his eyes closed.

Fin steps up to the side of the bed and reaches out, stroking his fingers across the back of John's hand. He curls his fingers through John's and stares down at him, ignoring the burn of tears in his eyes. He can't believe how close he came to losing John.

"You can't do that to me. I can't lose you, okay? You stubborn bastard." Fin squeezes John's hand before sinking down into the chair beside the bed.

Olivia and Cragen look in a few minutes later. "He still out?"

"Yeah." Fin says, looking up at them.

"We'll check in tomorrow on both of them. See you." Olivia says, ducking out again.

Fin looks back at John and sighs, making himself as comfortable as he can in the chair. Eventually he drifts off into an uneasy sleep, hand still holding John's.

"Well, isn't this domestic?" John says, voice rough.

Fin groans and sits up slowly, back protesting his hunched over position on the bed. He notices that he's still holding John's hand as John speaks.

"You are an asshole, you know that?" Fin says, looking over at John.

"I have been told that on occasion, yes." John says with a shrug.

"You're not allowed to do this to me again, understand?" Fin manages to actually look fierce enough that John agrees without a sarcastic comment.

John strokes his thumb across Fin's knuckles. "I'm sorry."

Fin stands up and cups John's cheek with his free hand, pressing his mouth against John's, kissing him gently. It surprises them both for a moment after Fin pulls back.

"Well, that's certainly something nice to wake up to." John allows a small smile to curl at his lips.

"I'm just glad you woke up at all." Fin admits, still holding onto John.

"Now, now, let's not go down that road." John shakes his head.

"Yeah." Fin agrees easily, leaning in again to kiss John.

A few minutes later, Olivia and Cragen come in and check on John before leaving to go see Elliot.

"How is he?" John asks.

"Fine. Took one in the elbow. I hear they're releasing him today." Fin says.

"Are they releasing me too?" John asks, arching an eyebrow.

"I don't know. Probably not since yours was worse than Elliot's." Fin says.

"But I don't want to spend all day here." John protests.

"Should've thought about that before you got shot." Fin says.

"It's not like I shot myself, you know." John says, unamused.

Fin merely shrugs, a smirk pulling on his mouth.

"Rude." John huffs.

Fin squeezes his hand and smiles when John squeezes back.

He came so close losing John and he never wants to feel like that again and he never will if he has anything to do about it.


End file.
